tjriv

tjriv @ 2009-05-12T23:16:00

2009-05-13T03:23:21Z

I get to go home thursday night. thats pretty awesome. I know ill love being home. I will certainly miss my friends here, but i might visit them. And my home friends and my girlfriend are fantastic. Freshman year, whattup. You were like a song from a good band you've never heard of. You sit there and say do i like this? And then the song hits it's stride and you say wow i could really see myslef liking this. And then you it ends and you say damn. That was good. I kinda wish it didn't end. idk, i always make music metaphors.

Stratford better get reeady.

tjriv @ 2009-04-26T21:59:00

2009-04-27T02:08:44Z

I have homework to do. So im going to do this instead. I saw Jack's Mannequin this afternoon and besides being beyond sweltering out i really liked it. They played a solid set, including Cavanaugh Park from the SOCO days.
School is going to be hard because i am so lazy and i actually have work to do. Awful awful.

There is much more taxing, important business on my mind but this is not the time nor the venue for that to be discussed. I am drained.
At least my roommate is sleeping in his girlfriends room tonight so if i have a breakdown it won't be awkward.

In other news, i am already uncomfortably sunburned and hating this weather. WTF summer. You suck.

tjriv @ 2009-03-30T00:42:00

2009-03-30T04:49:09Z

there are so many things that i want to do that i feel like i could never do. i know that i should think positively if i want to do them, but i do a much better job thinking everything is the end of the world. Maybe it is. No, its not. Im still searching for who i am and i wish i could find him. oh well.

As a side note, everyone should go listen to a band called Manchester Orchestra.

hopefully i won't be as melodramatic in the morning.

tjriv @ 2009-03-01T18:17:00

2009-03-01T23:21:01Z

so i got my backpack and three textbooks stolen last night. cool. I have the play in like 3 days. cool. I'm behind on my school work. cool. I act like an asshole all the time now. cool.

My life is cool.

tjriv @ 2009-02-07T02:04:00

2009-02-07T07:17:15Z

im waiting for my laundry, so im going to update because i never ever do.

im living my life. This semester is okay so far. My classes are all pretty standard, none to awesome or terrible. One of my roommates moved down the hall so i got some extra space so thats sweet. It is fun here, but you know home is great too. Im in my first college production, Shakespeare's As You Like It. I have the smallest part possible i think. lol. It really time consuming which kinda sucks but its fun. Im trying to learn wish you were here on guitar. I feel like im gaining weight but idk if i actually am. I miss maggie. I wanna go to a show really bad. Its time to look for new sneakers i think. I want to be a better person and be able to admit that im wrong.

okay laundry time. I also want to see Prince really bad.

bye people.

tjriv @ 2009-01-10T23:49:00

2009-01-11T05:27:12Z

Dan Rahrig did it. And i know it's late but im gonna list some of my favorite albums of 2008. Cause i love music and I'm bored.So......In no particular order because i can't make decisions.........Comment with thoughts or if you want explanations or want to argue or whateverrrr

1. Underdog Alma Mater- Forever The Sickest Kids

2. Narrow Stairs- Death Cab For Cutie

3. Avalon- Anthony Green

4. Dance Gavin Dance- Dance Gavin Dance

5. Folie a Deux- Fall Out Boy

6. A Guide To Love, Loss And Depression- The Wombats

7. Used And Abused- Danger Radio

8. Tha Carter III- Lil' Wayne

9. Viva La Vida- Coldplay

Also, Check Out:::: We All Need A Reason To Believe- Valencia,    Thursday's Four Tracks on the Thursday/Envy Split, Innerpartysystem- Innerpartysystem, The Morning Light- The Morning Light, Can't Stop, Won't Stop- The Maine

Music that would have made it if i listened to it more:: Way To Normal- Ben Folds, The Ocean And The Sea- The Sound Of Animals Fighting, Day & Age- The Killers, Oracular Spectacular- MGMT, The Glass Passenger- Jack's Mannequin

tjriv @ 2008-12-13T13:42:00

2008-12-13T18:44:40Z

i wish i was better.
i don't know why i cant be.

Do we have time to follow our heart?

2008-10-20T04:22:50Z

Class in about 12 hours, good time to update i guess. i had a good weekend and now im back in Poughkeepsie. One half of the semester done. it goes pretty quick. It seems like everyone is having a good time doing whatever it is that they are doing. which is good. Am i having a good time you ask? sure. Is college the great time everyone says it is. Not yet. but whatever. I've decided that there is no point in doing something if you are not having fun. why suffer? it doesn't make sense. So. whatever man. i don't mean to be depressing. im not depressed. It just like. When you lay down at night, trying to fall asleep, is there a churning going on that tells you that there must be more than this routine and this existence? A feeling that there could be so much more? its a rhetorical question.

shakespeare

2008-09-06T06:02:52Z

Tomorrow and tomorrow and tomorrow creeps in this petty pace from day to day to the last syllable of time and all our yesterdays have lighted fools the way of dusty death. Out, out brief candle. Life's but a walking shadow. A poor player who struts and frets his hour on the stage and then is heard from no more. It is a tale told by an idiot. A tale filled with sound and fury, signifying nothing. ~Macbeth, Act 5

I like.

tjriv @ 2008-06-08T22:56:00

2008-06-09T03:05:43Z

T.J.'s Geniuses of the month. (in no particular order)

-Chris Carrabba
-Ben Gibbard
-Jesse Lacey
-Andrew McMahon
-Justin Pierre

Ain't nobody got it like they got it. If you dont know who they are, youre missing out. in my humble opinion anyway. Now i just need to write as well as them and I can join the list. yeah right.

tjriv @ 2008-05-21T22:07:00

2008-05-22T02:13:59Z

im very mixed up. the person this is mostly to will never see this, but i dont give a shit. i feel like a bad person, a generally bad person. not oh its a joke, TJ's a dick haha. a legitimate poor human. i never meant for it to happen, i never thought it would. i screwed up big time. what can i do? nothing. i cant think of anything to do. i betrayed you and i dont know if youll be able to forgive me. maybe i dont deserve it. who knows. i just wish it didnt have to be like this.

tjriv @ 2008-05-05T22:54:00

2008-05-06T02:59:31Z

another birthday almost over, one of the best ive ever spent. i always feel like everyone is so nice to me on my birthday and i dont really deserve it, or that i dont thank everyone or seem grateful enough for all the things that were done for me. two surprises in one day was mad cool. im 18 now, so i guess thats cool. my life right now is pretty cool. and i guess thats all that matters. im going to go to sleep cause i have the AP stats test in the morning. whoops, waste of time and money. but i am going to toads to see the Fall of Troy which is badass. im really anxious right now but i think its cause im all emotional from today. hopefully i dont throw up. love to all. thanks again everyone who saw me, talked to me, wrote on my facebook wall or did anything to make me feel awesome today.

tjriv @ 2008-03-08T15:08:00

2008-03-08T20:31:07Z

"We seem to try in the simple, furious span of the individual to draw a savage indictment of the contemporary scene or to escape from it; into a make-believe region of swords and magnolias and mockingbirds which perhaps never existed anywhere. Both of the courses are rooted in sentiment; perhaps the ones who write savagely and bitterly of the incest in clay-floored cabins are the most sentimental."- William Faulkner

If you didn't follow that, its okay. I read it like 10 times before i realized it holds a universal truth. There is always more feeling with pain then there is with happiness. Passion comes from a dark place. Why are so many of our favorite songs, stories and movies sad? because sadness is something everyones feels. It hits harder. It cuts us to the core of our very being. and for those who do not often feel extreme emotions, its a chance to feel something. Hurt and loss breed great things, so one can't wish for the banishment of these feelings. Having your words stick in your throat, mixing with the choked back tears and creating a sharp pain, only outdone by the utter emptiness that is growing in your gut makes you stronger. or so we tell ourselves.
I don't mean to be depressing, but unfortunately, i have a difficult time being positive. I hold with me an overwhelming feeling that mostly all the dreams we have in this lifetime will stay dreams. That there is something else in this life that we are missing, and that most of us will never achieve the thing that will make us whole. i am probably naive in some respects but i accept that. sadness sticks with you much longer than happiness because it is stronger. because it is something you can cling to.

tjriv @ 2008-01-01T16:08:00

2008-01-01T21:11:31Z

2008 is gonna be weird.

whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy?

There's a peice of me and its burning in your heart...

2007-12-27T04:15:04Z

well that complicates things a bit now doesn't it?

tjriv @ 2007-12-23T12:08:00

2007-12-23T17:11:18Z

last night was the most insane show i have ever been to. I don't even know. my body hurts. but it's a good hurt.

tjriv @ 2007-12-14T23:07:00

2007-12-15T04:26:21Z

well. ive been in a bad mood these past few days for no real reason in particular. thats even worse than knowing why you feel like crap. i guess ill snap out of it. but i just miss the days when stuff was easy. i wish i knew what people were thinking too. cause then it would be easy and i would be in a good mood again.
snow days on which i get nothing accomplished make me feel pretty stupid.
I feel stuck. and i like freedom. wow im bad at writing feelings down. or having them all together.
has anyone ever felt like there should be something else in this life? you only get one, and when you end the day, you feel a void. a hole that keeps you from feeling whole. that leaves you with insecurities. and just questions. fuckin A

tjriv @ 2007-11-08T18:09:00

2007-11-08T23:22:05Z

well hello there. my life is pretty good i guess. im holdin it down even though im busy as a hot whore at a comic book convention. yes that was a shot at nerds and their lack of sexual activity. I saw hairspray and it was sick. it reminded me of high school musical and how awesome it was and how awesome the cast was and how awesome the director was. Im sorry but i dont think STAGE can compare. Im having second thoughts about little women. like i dont feel like going nuts over it when i just want to have a life in my senior year. but i feel like i will be letting mad people down if i dont. idk. but in better news, im pumped to bring collin to his first show on saturday and hopefully its good. college shit is going pretty smoothly so im all set there. i hope. ive been in a good mood. i am also struggling with another situation but that is a whole other thing that i dont care to go into at this point in time. i think the cold weather does this too me, i feel revitalized.

tjriv @ 2007-10-19T23:32:00

2007-10-20T03:44:05Z

shittttttttttttt. i have an english essay, a health essay, and independent reading project and a physics essay all due like a week or less from now. which is less than a week before high school musical open which i am super nervous for. i hate school so much.
i really wanna see nightmare before christmas in 3D.
oh i guess i gotta do all that stuff for college too.
nah, who goes to college anyway.
my boss is gonna be pissed that i cant work for like two weeks straight.
oh well ima punch her in the face anyway.
The spill canvas has horns the chorus of this song and its awesome. cause they arent ska horns. they are like non whack horns.
its way to fucking hot for oct fucking tober.

im out for now. sweet.

tjriv @ 2007-10-08T19:22:00

2007-10-08T23:23:17Z

maybe this one will work.

tjriv @ 2007-10-08T19:20:00

2007-10-08T23:20:44Z

check out my hot remix. im nice.

tjriv @ 2007-09-26T00:01:00

2007-09-26T04:07:53Z

well.......... being busy sucks. but i guess that comes with the good looks and talent in many areas. Ive been feeling pretty good for the last while which is good. I didnt expect it. About one month till high school musical, about two months till my first application deadline. oh boy. A lot of the time i feel out of the loop, and it is a little annoying but i am currently shaking it off. Mad new music floatin around out there that i need to procure and enjoy. (all time low, secret handshake, motion city soundtrack (if its out yet idk).) and other such things. When i have had a chance to slow down i realize that come this time next year....ill miss this.

tjriv @ 2007-08-25T00:27:00

2007-08-25T05:03:00Z

well school starts soon and i better update. i dont know how the two are related. it just feels right. life is pretty good. my two most exciting things of the day were finding out im going to the Projekt Revolution tour and that we got a new broom at work. My life is pretty ordinary i guess but i love it that way. I hate drama and being busy and stuff. school better not be hard or im gonna be pissed. college stuff better not suck either. music basically rules my life. i love it. i dont even know how to describe it. i also feel like. im not myself. its a product of my environment. i dont know if i want to change it. i just feel strange. Its almost like most of the stuff i do im watching somebody do them. like an out of body experience. im getting sick i think too. which is odd. not to say my previous comment wasnt odd cause now you might think i have to go to an institution. but it is wierd. im gonna try to go back to my roots. i feel like a bad person for it too. i have so many second thoughts and things i look back on. and its very bad. yeah ive changed. is it for the better?

tjriv @ 2007-07-22T00:09:00

2007-07-22T04:18:26Z

i have a whole lot of stuff inside that i want to let out. like i dont even know. well i do, but you guys dont. but thats okay. you might know soon enough. as a side note, anyone have a synthesizer or access to one or someone who rents them? if so awesome tell me. dont laugh at me either. please. Ive noticed that im very passionate. and i like it. not sexually wise. well yes. but thats not what im talking about here. I feel ahhhhhhh. i might go insane soon.

tjriv @ 2007-07-15T22:14:00

2007-07-16T02:23:41Z

I am gonna punch myself in the face. i'm working during a rehersal and during zach's graduation party. WTF MOM AND DAD. i didnt want a job and now i have it and rehersal which im gonna miss a lot of which i feel really bad for. and camp and fuckin summer reading and my mom wants me to start writing my college essay.

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.